It’s two years since I legally changed my name. It took a couple of months from then for my preferences to become clear, but now feels like a good time for a reminder or clarification of what they are.
My name is Fred Langridge and that’s what everyone should call me. (There’s a longer name on my passport and driving licence, as for lots of people.)
My pronoun is singular ‘they’: “This is Fred; they’re our friend/clerk/IT person.” “Fred made themself a cup of tea.”
(I can cope with ‘he’ if necessary for brief interactions; I am extremely uncomfortable with ‘she’.)
I am genderqueer, nonbinary gendered and best referred to as a person.
I am absolutely not a girl, woman or lady, and I am happy when people train themselves out of referring to me as such. I am currently happier when strangers call me ‘sir’ than ‘madam’, although I prefer neither.
I don’t use a prefix like Mr or Ms; if a computer system can’t cope without one, I go for Mx.
If you slip up, apologise and move on. If you don’t try at all, please be aware that that does make me sad.
Thanks to everyone who has been trying and training themselves and making me feel comfortable!